The last 4 days were flawless.
I managed to stick to the morning-latte / coffee and broth / vegetables for dinner routine, and I did some really good workouts, and I went down 4 pounds.... I know, lots of this is water weight and other fluctuations, but it just feels awesome!!!
But I am missing something, usually there´s this high after stepping on THE SCALE and seeing a low number, right now I am just thinking:
Well, getting down, good thing. More tomorrow.
And that´s all.
I am wondering where this is taking me. Do I come to the point at which no number can be low enough? At which there´s no satisfaction what so ever? I was always wondering if I would ever reach this... My first goal weight is in sight again, and I am only thinking about the second one. I guess I am really back on track.
But none of these things makes me sad or really worried. I am just determined, I think that´s the right expression for this.
Tomorrow will be another 24h shift. Usually, in the middle of the night, I start eating and destroy some hard days work, maybe I can change this pattern now? Maybe I can behave for once? If there are new point of views in my life, I can get new behaviour?
I know that I should not put too much pressure on myself during those long work hours, in the middle of the night you get lonely and insecure and over the edge tired, and if the pressure level gets too high you start to lose control. Maybe I should allow myself a higher cal number? Righ now, I am around 500 every day, and I am not hungry all the time, I don´t even think about eating.... Maybe I can have 800?
I don´t know....
OK, here´s the plan:
I start the day like any other day, and eat around 500, and if there´s a breakdown in the middle of the night I will go for another 300.
Period.
No ordered pizza.
Salad...
No cake, no chocolate...
I had cauliflower today, I am starting to love this stuff, and I cut out the fish allowing myself to get low fat sauce.... Perfect...
Wish me luck to stick to the plan for tomorrow, I need it.
No, not luck, determination.
That´s it.
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Great job on your 4 pounds. Is it ever enough? Great question. I ask myself that all the time. It's gotta be extremely hard not to get hungry on a 24 hr shift. Sleep time accounts for a good chunk of time that even if you are hungry you don't know that you are and can't eat-so cutting that out-whew!! Rough. Good luck with your plan.
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